This week’s note starts with some glorious garden news. Congratulations goes out to Kathy Hacker, Melissa Barbano, Libby Estrin, Jennifer Sutton and Shana and Jonah Sonnenshein, all ECC parents and awesome garden volunteers, who mutually collaborated to write and apply for the Whole Foods Grant. This was literally a labor of love, when after two prior applications we finally won the $2,000 award! These funds are targeted for the creation of a pollinator garden on the west side of our campus. I will soon be the luckiest winner as I look out my office window and see a plethora of butterflies, hummingbirds and insects politely pollinating our flowers and plantings. Can’t wait!
Parenting Strategy for the Week: Kids who won’t take “No” for an answer
Have you ever been faced with a persistent child who asks you a question that you answer, not to his or her liking, and he or she asks again, and again, and again, hoping you will cave in and change your answer?
As a parent you have two choices: Continue to repeat the same answer, or become frustrated and irritated, and so you relent, and change the answer to something the child wants to hear.
In doing this, the child achieves his goal, getting the answer he wanted, and he learns that if he asks you the same question, over and over, eventually you will change your answer. Does this sound familiar? I know as a parent, I am guilty. At home, with my teenage daughter, I have started a new strategy. The concept is simple. Instead of constantly repeating yourself, follow the process below:
Step One: Ask your child, “Have you ever heard of ‘Asked and Answered’?”
Step Two: Ask your child, “Did you ask me a question about …?”
Step Three: Ask your child, “Did I answer it?”
Step Four: Ask your child, “Do I look like the kind of mom/dad who will change her/his mind if you ask me the same thing over and over?”
Step Five: If your child asks again, simply say, “Asked and Answered.” (No other words are necessary!) Once this technique has been established, these are the only words you should need to say to address nagging questions.
I have been using this technique for a month with positive results in my home. I hope it will work for you too! Let me know.